On his February 10, 2012 interview on WNYC’s The Brian Lehrer Show, Senate President Stephen Sweeney said that 67 percent of marriages end up in divorce. Still, this doesn’t mean those who didn’t seek a divorce were happy with their marriages.
If your marriage is slowly entering the “on the rocks” stage, your solution is to employ variety of how to love your wife techniques and not file for divorce due to irreconcilable differences.
How can you do this? Stick around and read until the end. In a world where divorce is the general rule and not an exception, here are 18 tips on how to love your wife again – and channel you and your wife’s inner Mr. and Mrs. Smith.
1. Good Hygiene: A Simple but Effective Technique to Make Your Wife Love You Again
Admit it. During the dating stage, you always made sure you looked your best. After all, you want to impress the woman that will later on become your wife.
Unfortunately, things changed when you got married. There is a certain level of comfort that makes it okay not to shave or shower before bedtime. She accepted you for who you are, flaws included, and still loves you no matter what – at least according to you.
If you want to make your marriage last, then start with cleaning yourself up more and observing proper hygiene. This includes:
- Getting regular haircuts
- Wearing clean clothes
- Taking a shower at least once a day
- Shaving regularly
- Making sure you smell good
- Brushing your teeth
They may sound simple, but good hygiene goes a long way. Good hygiene is also among the tips on how to make love to your wife, so read on.
2. Why a Simple Text Message Could Save the Day
If there is one thing you should be thankful about technology, it allows faster and more convenient way of communication. Take the case of text messaging. Who would’ve thought that you will be able to send a message to someone even if you are miles away?
Take advantage of this innovation when it comes to how to love your wife better. Sending a simple text message such as “I miss you” or “I can’t wait to see you tonight” could spell a difference in your marriage.
The key here is to be spontaneous when sending text messages. Don’t bombard her with tons of messages, since this will surely tick her off.
3. Household Chores: A Shared Responsibility Between Husband and Wife
How often do you help in household chores? If your wife is doing all the work and you do nothing, but sit in front of the television, then you might have a problem.
One of the simplest yet most effective techniques on how to love your wife is by helping her with chores. According to 2007 Pew Research Poll, sharing household chores is the third most important component of a successful marriage, next to faithfulness and good sex. In the United States, men’s participation in housework doubled in the past 40 years, although women still do most of the work.
This means despite the improvement, your wife’s still in charge of cooking, kids, and cleaning – all at the same time. This shouldn’t be the case. Divide the chores equally between you two and her sex drive will follow. This will make her happier as well and who knows, she might be typing “how to love your husband” to make sure that you are happy.
4. Keep Calm and Don’t be Embarrassed to Brush Your Wife’s Hair
Are you surprised to see this entry? Don’t be.
Keep in mind that marriage requires adding flavor and variety in your daily routine. This means you need to think of unexpected ways and employ surprising tools to make sure that marriage issues won’t get in the way and lead to divorce. One of these surprising tools is to brush your wife’s hair.
Here’s the thing: the scalp contains thousands of nerves that could trigger sexual arousal. This is also the reason why pulling a woman’s hair is among the must-do inside the bedroom because it involves sensitive nerves that puts her in the mood.
While you’re brushing her hair, don’t be afraid to tease her by kissing her neck or gently blowing on her ears. Complimenting her will also be helpful.
Just in case the situation calls for it and you may not feel ready yet, don’t forget your Extenze male enhancement pills. It helps you with arousal, orgasms and boosting your stamina inside the bedroom.
5. Regularly Plot “Couple Time” in Your Schedule
When was the last time you went out on a date with your wife? If you choose hobbies and buddies over her, then it won’t be surprising if your marriage is going down the drain.
The truth is, date nights are essential in every relationship. Going out together creates romantic rituals and allows you both to be husband and wife, which are good for the relationship.
However, don’t settle with the usual dinner dates. While this will always be a crowd favorite, date nights are better if you use it as an opportunity to try something new and share new experiences together.
In other words, step out of your comfort zone and be creative. It could range from soaking in the tub together every night to visiting a new place to doing something extreme like bungee jumping together. The bottom line is couple time should be all about you and enjoying each other’s company without worrying too much about what you left behind, at least for a few hours.
In relation to couple time, you might want to do the next tip.
6. Shower Her with Gifts Once in a While
There is pressure to buy your wife a gift on her birthday, during Christmas, or anniversary. Change things up in the household by surprising her with a gift even without the need for an occasion.
It could be as simple as giving her a time off after a stressful work week, buying a gift certificate from her favorite store, or a piece of new jewelry for all the hard work she did. You can buy concert tickets to see her favorite band for her and a girl friend. Don’t forget to leave a sweet note
Just take it easy when giving gifts. Simple, spontaneous gifts are okay, but if you give her one everyday, she might think that you are guilty of something – and you don’t want that.
Nevertheless, try this next tip.
7. Master the Art of Appreciation to Make Your Marriage Last Long
Your everyday routine includes getting up in the morning, preparing for work, eating, spending eight or so hours in the office, going home and sleeping. You may not admit it, but you rarely pay attention to what your wife is doing for you and your family. Worse, you probably don’t even notice how much she has sacrificed to make everyone in your household happy.
Change this habit and start paying attention to your wife. Believe it or not, a simple “Thank you” could make her day. It is important to make her feel that you appreciate her efforts and that you value her as a person. This is where showering her with gifts from time to time or helping her with chores comes in. These are simple but effective ways to reward her for what she’s done to your family.
Remember, showing your appreciation is not limited to giving gifts. Read the next sections to find out how else you could show your appreciation using some “when all else fails” techniques on how to love your wife when she hates you.
8. Understanding the Science of Touch to Keep Your Marriage Going
A kiss, hug, pat on the back, and holding hands. These may be simple acts, but did you know that it could do so much in your marriage?
According to a study, touch communicates wider range of emotions compared to gestures. This means giving your wife a kiss and hug before you leave for work could help rekindle the warmth and tenderness you once felt as a couple.
What should you do then?
Before going to work and as soon as you get home, give your wife a kiss and hug. Regardless of the arguments you had the night before, make sure you do this everyday to make the exercise more effective. It might sound silly, but you won’t even notice what these simple acts could do to your marriage.
Before you know it, this physical affection could take your marriage to the next level – without you having to pay for a divorce.
9. Smile: It’s the Simplest Way to Show Her You’re Happy
Laughter may be the best medicine, but it turns out that smile could also be your wing man in keeping your marriage intact.
What’s with a smile anyway?
Aside from flashing your pearly whites, smile is a simple, non-verbal way of telling your wife how happy and lucky you feel to be with her. It is sending a signal full of positive emotions.
For her, it is an affirmation that she is doing a great job as a wife and a mother.
What are you waiting for? Go ahead and smile as much as you can. Make sure to keep it real and genuine because a woman can easily tell if you are faking it just to get inside her pants.
Keep on reading. There are more tips waiting for you about how to love your wife unconditionally.
10. It’s Okay to Have Friends But Be Careful with Female Friendships
Wherever you go, there will always be a possibility of meeting new people, especially women. That’s how life is. While there are women who are meant to stay as your friends, there are many others who might expect more than just friendship.
What does this mean?
It’s okay to be friends with the opposite sex; however, play it safe and make sure you are cautious with your actions. Don’t allow yourself to give in to temptations and urges. At the same time, make sure you have an exit strategy in case you get caught in a tempting situation with a female friend.
Here is the surprising part: affairs outside the marriage are not just physical ones. They can be emotional too; therefore, know when you need to draw the line and say no before things get too complicated.
11. Value Her Individuality: An Essential Tip to Remember When it Comes to How to Love Your Wife
Every person in this planet is unique, including your wife. Before you met her, she already established herself and knew what she wanted in her life. She also has her own set of beliefs, principles, needs, wants, and plans, which she shared with you. She may develop new preferences or let herself be influenced by your beliefs, but her personality will always be intact.
Do you want to know how to love your wife better? Value her individuality.
This means accept your wife for who she is as a person. Don’t compare her to anyone – your mother, sister, and even your previous partners – and even be open about it. Your wife is a unique person that doesn’t come in pairs. Learn to respect her and she will surely employ the tips she may have learned on how to love your husband according to the Bible.
12. Keep Your Ears Open and Listen to What She Has to Say
Imagine this: you are excited to tell your wife about what happened earlier at work. As you share your story, you noticed that she is not as enthusiastic as you are and even looks distracted. You may not admit it, but this hurt your feelings.
Just in case it’s her turn to tell something and you look disinterested, it will surely hurt her feelings, too. Don’t make her feel that way.
One of the longings of every human heart is to be heard. It sounds simple, but listening to what your wife has to say can be challenging. There are too many distractions and things you need to accomplish that at times, you tend to take your wife for granted.
How do you address this?
Set aside a specific time everyday that allows you to talk to each other. It could be during dinner time or a few minutes before your scheduled bedtime. Take away all these distractions and just focus on each other. You might be surprised with what you’ll hear from her, so make sure you will listen attentively. This includes asking her opinions and views in the decision-making.
While you’re at it, make sure you also do the next tip.
13. Say It: The Importance of Verbally Expressing Your Love to Keep Your Marriage Intact
Do you say “I love you” once in a while to your wife? If yes, how often do you say it?
They say actions speak louder than words. That’s true. You will never run out of options to show your love for your wife. While she appreciates those gestures that will surely bring butterflies in her stomach, she would be more than happy to hear you verbally express your love to her.
What’s the point?
Say it and say it out loud and proud. Verbally express your feelings and tell her how much you appreciate and love her. You don’t need fancy, flowery words to impress her. All you need are genuineness and sincerity and you will surely deliver the message more effectively.
14. Cherish the Kids and Spend Time with Them as Much as You Can
The bond between a mother and a child is beyond words. It may be biological in nature, but it is true that a mother’s love is beyond compare.
Still, this doesn’t mean you don’t have a role to play when it comes to kids. This leads you back to division of labor in chores. Your wife wants you to spend time with the kids and see that you are serious in fulfilling your role as a father. When you invest time and energy with your children, it’s as if you spent time and energy with her.
They grow up too fast these days, so be sure to cherish your kids. Set aside a specific time where you can be with them and be a father. Believe it or not, your wife is watching and she appreciates what you are doing for the children. Keep it up.
15. Be Romantically Old School: On Writing Love Letters to Your Wife
In the age where computers are making your life easier, when was the last time you sent her a handwritten love letter? If you haven’t tried writing her a love letter, then now is the right time to do it.
It sounds old school, but handwritten letters could add spark in your marriage. It is more genuine and sincere because you spent time writing her a letter instead of focusing on your usual routine.
You might say, how about verbal expression?
The key here is to strike a balance between these two acts. Write love letters to your wife occasionally and make sure you set aside some time talking about almost anything. You surely won’t worry about marriage issues.
16. Fight the Current and Work Hard to Stay In Love
During the courtship and honeymoon phase, you tend to focus on the good side of the person and seldom notice the not-so-good aspects of her personality. Even if you notice, you tried to accept these flaws and negative aspects since your emotions are taking over.
Apparently, things change when you are married. The longer you stay in the marriage, the more likely you’ll pay attention to the not-so-good side of your wife. Plus, you won’t even notice that it is taking a toll in your relationship.
Don’t let this current take over your marriage. While it is true that the natural course of marriage is going down the drain, you don’t need to be part of that group. Fight the current by working hard to stay in love with your wife. Focus on the traits that made you fall in love with her and remind yourself of the importance of intentional positive communication.
You and your wife both deserve better.
17. Give Her Time to Herself – and Say Goodbye to Marital Problems
Everyone needs to take a break and recharge, including your wife.
After a hectic day with the kids, all she needs is a nice, warm bath and a good night’s sleep. Occasionally, her body might scream for a body massage to ease any tension she has built up over the day. Unfortunately, these simple needs are easy to neglect.
Be the best husband you can be and allow your wife to restart by giving her time to herself. Schedule a specific day where she can do anything she wants. While she is having time for herself, make sure you let her be. Don’t bombard her with countless text messages and phone calls, asking her what time she will finish.
Give your wife a break. She deserves it.
18. Learn to Forgive to Teach Yourself How to Love Your Wife Unconditionally
One aspect that separates humans from other species is the ability to make mistakes and learn from it. In fact, mistakes are what make humans, humans.
Surely, your wife made and will make tons of mistakes in her lifetime. Some of these mistakes will greatly affect your marriage while there are many others that you can let go. Regardless of the nature of the mistake, one thing is for sure: learn how to forgive.
Keep in mind that forgiveness is at the heart of every meaningful relationship. It is difficult to stay in a relationship that doesn’t know the real meaning of forgiveness.
If you are really after loving your wife and staying away from divorce, then master the art of forgiving. Your wife is not perfect and will never run out of mistakes. In case she committed one, sit down, talk about it as mature individuals, find out ways on how to prevent it from happening again, and let go. Marriage is not an excellent keeper of negative feelings.
What’s the bottom line? Gentlemen, learn how to love your wives.
Every woman is different and there is no exact formula that will tell you how you can prevent marital issues. Nonetheless, these 18 tips on how to love your wife could give you a head start to ensure a longer-lasting marriage. Go ahead and choose among these tips. You can even make your own list according to your wife’s personality.
The important thing is to love your wife – and always remind yourself of that.