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10 Misconceptions on the Realities of Sex and Aging  


Menopause and andropause are only two of the many things couples worry about as soon as they hit the 4-0 mark. Aside from this, sex starts to become an issue and you will feel that your sex life is slowing down. After all, sex and old age are two things that don’t go together, at least according to many people’s point of view.

It doesn’t have to be that way. Sex in your 50’s and beyond may be challenging, but not impossible. In fact, one study showed that almost 40 percent of men aged 75 to 85 are still sexually active. This only proves that sex does not discriminate according to age. With the right tools and proper preparation, you will be able to have a satisfying sex life, regardless of your age. Here are 10 of the most common misconceptions on senior sex, along with the real facts.

1. Your Manhood Won’t Work

men in their senior yearsThis is the most common misconception about sex and old age. You heard it countless times that men in their senior years are less likely to get it up. Here’s the truth: your erection in your 60’s may not be the same as your erection in your 20’s.

Still, this doesn’t mean it won’t work. According to an AARP survey, 75 percent of men above 70 had few erectile issues. For the rest, there are ways to help them cope with erection problems.

Aging is not the primary cause for ED, although the diminishing hormones have an effect down there. In that case, there are various methods, which could help you in the stimulation process and arousal. You and your ladylove might need to spend a few extra minutes giving each other a massage and working with your sense of touch.

2. Her Womanhood Needs A Little Help

depressionMenopause does lead to vaginal dryness. This is an effect of hormonal fluctuations and the sudden drop of estrogen levels, which disrupt the balances inside the female body.

Psychological issues, such as mood changes and depression could also get in the way. However, this does not mean that your ladylove’s area down there won’t work at all.

Just like you, longer foreplay and extra time down there will help her in the stimulation and arousal process. There are also lubricants available, which is a big help in taking care of dry spell. Estrogen-based creams could also help plump vaginal tissues to minimize discomfort during sex.

3. Pain Tries To Get In The Way

Whether you are 18 or 80, pain will always find a way to knock at your door and ruin your sex life. There will be physical barriers, which will prevent you from having the best sex of your life at 50.

Women experience biological changes such as thinning of the vaginal walls, which leads to painful or uncomfortable intercourse. This is because the hormonal changes associated with aging leads to thinning and drying of vaginal tissues. The good news is there are over-the-counter treatments available to minimize pain and discomfort at this point in your sex life. Take advantage of those.

4. Physical Challenges Will Get In The Way

knee problems
Photo by James Heilman, MD / CC BY-SA 3.0

Pain and discomfort is an issue when you have sex in your 50’s and above. Aside from the hormonal fluctuations, you might experience other types of pain, such as aching hip joints, rheumatism and knee problems.

Yes, these physical barriers could make sex uncomfortable. Are you going to let these barriers stop you?

Changing positions to something more appropriate for your condition, and adding pillows for support could ease discomfort inside the bedroom. You can also take OTC pain medication to manage pain before sex.

5. Sex Is Dangerous As You Get Older

Here’s another truth: your physical limitations will get in the way inside the bedroom. You and your partner are less flexible, and aching joints and muscles will make it difficult for you to do certain positions. You are also at a higher risk of hurting yourself because of impaired balance and stability. Does this mean sex is dangerous at old age?

Perhaps. However, by employing extra care and caution, the worse you can get inside the bedroom are aches and pains from arthritic joints and unused muscles. Consequently, being active inside the bedroom improves physical, emotional, and mental health. If you have concerns on what to avoid during sex, then don’t hesitate to consult your doctor.

6. An Aging Body Is Not Sexy

An Aging Body Is Not SexyYou might lose your six-pack abs and toned biceps due to the weight gain associated with aging. Your ladylove might not have the Bay watch body she once had when she was in her 20’s.

Extra pounds in various areas in your body might also make you feel undesirable. However, is sex always about the way you look?

When it comes to matters between the sheets, the physical aspect is just a bonus. Sure, seeing a sexy woman in her bikini will turn you on. However, sex is also about using your sense of touch.

You become aroused when you stroke and caress each other and kiss passionately. You focus on the naked body in bed and go past the cellulites and wrinkles. Your humor, experience, and passion will make up for the lost firmness and muscles in your body. Sex is not just about how you look. It’s also about your ability to bring and receive pleasure.

7. There Is No Need For Birth Control

pregnantGetting old means a drop in your testosterone levels, which affect your body’s reproductive process. Aging also means less potent sperm and lower sperm count. However, this doesn’t mean you cannot get someone pregnant.

Believe it or not, there are men in their 60’s who are still able to father a child. Women in their 40’s and approaching menopause, although it is harder, can still get pregnant.

Therefore, don’t skip the condoms. Unless your partner stops menstruating for one year or more, you are still not safe from being a daddy. In case you are in a new relationship, wearing condom is still imperative. It prevents you from fathering a child and protects you against sexually transmitted diseases. It’s better to be safe than sorry.

8. Sex Drive Drops As You Age

younger womenPhysical and hormonal issues such as drop in testosterone and estrogen levels could affect your sex drive. You might not be in the mood to do some hanky-panky while your grandchildren are sleeping soundly in the other room.

However, there is always two sides of the coin and old age may mean better sex drive. Surprisingly, younger women are more likely to experience low libidos due to variety of factors.

Pregnancy, breastfeeding, childbirth and the responsibility of kids can get in the way, which affects their sex drive. On the other hand, older women experience less stress because they don’t have to worry about carrying a life for nine months. The phrase, “sex drive drops as you age” is not always the case. When you are in retirement age, you have less responsibilities and more time for each other. Take time to get to know each other again and find new ways to connect.

9. You Don’t Need Sex As You Age

older couplesSays who? Sex and the younger generation are two concepts that go together. Always. However, this doesn’t follow that older couples don’t need sex.

Sex is a naturally occurring process and wherever you are, you will always find the need to do it. Otherwise, all species in this planet will lose all sorts of sexual feelings and urges, which is not what’s happening.

Humans are designed to have sex. It gives your health a boost and encourages better relationship among couples. It is also an effective yet cheaper stress reliever. Therefore, as long as you live, you will always feel the urge and keep your sexual energy intact – and it’s a good thing.

10. You Can’t Get Your Groove Back

At one point, you may stop wanting sex because of many factors such as kids, your job, financial constraints, relationship problems and personal issues. This does not mean you cannot fire up an old engine and get it working again.There may be physical and psychological obstacles to get your sex drive up and running, but it is not impossible. There are various ways to reignite and keep your sex life in the right track.
visit a doctorThe first thing you need to do is to visit a doctor to help you determine the cause of lack of libido.Erection issues are often a sign of a medical problem and you need to have it checked.

Your doctor will help you address any underlying conditions and prescribe medications to help your libido get back on its feet.

Overall health is likewise important in getting your groove back. Eat healthy and get enough sleep. Adding workout in your daily or weekly routine is also crucial. This keeps your heart in check to facilitate better blood flow down there. It also releases feel good hormones, which helps you change your perception about yourself. The healthier you are, the faster it is for you to get back on the sex track.

The good news is old age is the best time to be experimental. Don’t focus too much on physical and psychological impediments. Instead, treat senior sex as a challenge to make life even more exciting. Don’t let your age get in the way of enjoying every day of your life.

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